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六级英语作文,各位大侠看看有什么语法错误没,

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六级英语作文,各位大侠看看有什么语法错误没,
What is more important:character or academic achievement
Nowadays ,whether children can go to a university owes much to their exam marks,and it has become more distinct,result to many students think the marks is most improtant thing in their future ,instead of the good character.Moreover a lot of people make it turn into the major reference of students performance.
就一段
六级英语作文,各位大侠看看有什么语法错误没,
whether...owes to...
是否.,归功于.,改为whether...depends on...更为合适一些.
result to,后面是一个从句,应该加上that引导,result是及物动词,不用to.
用一个更常用的cause,替换sesult.
整句改为Nowadays ,whether children can go to a university depends much on their exam marks,which has become more distinct,and it cause that many students...
个人意见,仅供参考.