The way people hold to the belief that a fun - filled,pain f

The way people hold to the belief that a fun - filled,pain free life equals happiness actually reduces their chances of ever attaining real happiness.If fun and pleasure are equal to happiness then pain must be equal to unhappiness.But in fact,the opposite is true:more often than not things that lead to happiness involve some pain.
As a result,many people avoid the very attempts that are the source of true happiness.They fear the pain inevitably brought by such things as marriage,raising children,professional achievement,religious commitment （预担的义务）,self - improvement.
Ask a bachelor（单身汉） why he resists marriage even though he finds dating to be less and less satisfying.If he is honest he will tell you that he is afraid of making a commitment.For commitment is in fact quite painful.The single life is filled with fun,adventure,excitement.Marriage has such moments,but they are not its most distinguishing features.
Couples with infant children are lucky to get a whole night’s sleep or a three - day vacation.I don’t know any parent who would choose the word fun to describe raising children.But couples who decide not to have children never know the joys of watching a child grow up or of playing with a grandchild.
Understanding and accepting that true happiness has nothing to do with fun is one of the most liberating realizations.It liberates time:now we can devote more hours to activities that can genuinely increase our happiness.It liberates money:buying that new car or those fancy clothes that will do nothing to increase our happiness now seems pointless.And it liberates us from envy:we now understand that all those who are always having so much fun actually may not be happy at all.

人的方式举行,以相信,一种有趣的-填补,疼痛自由生活的幸福,其实等于降低了他们的机会都实现真正的幸福.如果乐趣和高兴都是平等的幸福,然后疼痛必须等于不满.但事实上,正好相反：更多的往往不是事情,导致幸福牵涉到一些痛苦.
因此,许多人避免非常有企图的来源,真正的幸福.他们害怕的痛苦,不可避免地带来这样的事情,结婚,养育子女,专业成就,宗教的承诺（预担的义务） ,自我-改善.问单身汉 ,为何他抗拒婚姻,即使他认为约会要少满足.如果他是诚实的,他都会告诉你,他是害怕作出承诺.为承诺,其实是相当痛苦的.单身的生活充满乐趣,冒险,刺激.婚姻有这样的时刻,但它们不是它的最显着的特点.
夫妇与婴儿幸运地得到一整夜的睡眠,或三-天的假期.我不知道任何家长谁都会选择这个词来形容,有趣的养育子女.但夫妇,谁决定不生孩子永远都不会知道的乐趣观看了儿童的成长,或打一个孙子.
理解和接受,真正的幸福,完全没有与有趣的是其中一个最解放体会.它解放时间：现在我们可以把更多的时间活动,能真正增加我们的幸福.它解放金钱：购买新汽车或那些喜欢的衣服将什么也不做,以增加我们的幸福,现在看来无谓的.它解放我们从令人羡慕的：我们现在明白,谁所有这些都是有这么多的乐趣,其实未必感到高兴.