请牛人帮我看看这篇托福的独立写作,能打打分就更好了.在下感激不敬 下个星期就考了.

请牛人帮我看看这篇托福的独立写作,能打打分就更好了.在下感激不敬 下个星期就考了.
Do you agree or disagree with following statement?
In 20 years from now on, students will not use printed book anymore.
Some, holding this belief that even in the modern society, the books that students use everyday would maintain manufacture by the paper materials, claim printed book is the traditional books for people. I concede their opinions. Nevertheless, as my perspective, there are few students would receive the knowledge through the papers any longer, they must be accustomed to look the text articles in their computers ,or“ipad” ,or something technical. The reasons why I say that are as followed.
The primary reason to support my opinion is that, the text books shown by the students’ computers would benefit for the surrounding environment, especially for forests. For example, one tree could products nearly 200 books in normal size, and the public school may have the 3000 students, We could make the scenes that one public school could save almost 15 trees if the students give up the printed books. Furthermore, the schools in the whole world all do the things like that could save a plenty trees.
The second reason is that, those books make up by paper are heavy to hold, it is bad for teenagers’ growth. I have suffered these paints for many years. For illustrated, in the China, students need to take more than 10 books to schools everyday, we always feel muscles’ ache when we go to school and bake to home.
On the other hand, it is important not to take this point too far. Our society is keeping developing in all respects include books’ mediums evolution. Ancient people write the vital things in the walls or draw on caves thousand years ago. But humankind created the paper several hundred years ago and then used it to be the writing materials. Similarly, people must invent the more technical mediums to place the paper we use today.
From that has been mentioned above, it is not difficult to assert this summary that the students may not use the books printed in the future, they will have the more convenient and technical books.

例子讲的有点生硬了……独立写作有具体的例子比较好.有细节.
比如你不一定要说我们觉得肌肉酸痛,
可以说我自己怎么怎么累反而没心情学习,然后身体也不好了
结尾段你自己的看法在哪里呢?
do YOU 【agree or disagree】哈.不是让你做判断哈.
The primary reason to support my opinion is that,
The second reason is that,
句式重了,换掉
大概看了一下= =大家都是考托的人,写作还是多写写为好